Elephants, Rhinos, and Lions, Oh My!

Etosha National Park, Namibia

Pretty much everyone goes to Africa for one reason: to view big, wild, hairy animals from a safe-yet-still-thrilling distance.  You would think you’d get the same experience from going to a football game or watching Russians at the beach, but let me assure you: this is way better.

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe

Some people are really fanatical about it, like the gentleman who approached us before our very first game drive in Hwange National Park in Zimbabwe, to ask us if we’d seen the greater yellow-spotted bushpecker or something.  We hadn’t, and he explained that, “That bird will be my 814th bird I’ve spotted in Southern Africa.  Can you believe that?”  No sir, I really can’t.

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe
Is this the little guy he was looking for?

 

We’re a bit less Audobon Society and a whole lot more “croc v. lion v. elephant death match” on YouTube.  But even for casual observers like us, your first glimpse of an African animal in the wild is guaranteed to give you goosebumps.  For us, it happened like this:  We were walking back from Victoria Falls National Park at dusk with two women from our group, about to take the dirt path shortcut back to our campsite.  We were foiled, however, by two African elephants, with enormous tusks, standing in the middle of the path having their dinner.  It was thrilling!

Okavango Delta, Botswana
What do you see, Jordan?

 

As with most things in life (my life, at least), safaris come with a checklist.  Everyone is out to see “The Big 5.”  I find this list a little arbitrary but I’ve been told that sightings of these animals are so coveted because back in the good old days they were the toughest and most dangerous animals to hunt on foot.

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So how many of The Big 5 did we spot?

 

The Big 5 are:

Elephant

We saw stacks of elephants in Etosha National Park, Namibia; at one point we even spied a herd of 30!  We got close enough to them on our night safari in Hwange National Park to smell them – they smell like horses and fresh grass.

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe - Version 2
At a watering hole in Hwange
Etosha National Park, Namibia
At a watering hole in Etosha
Etosha National Park, Namibia
An old fella hanging out by the road

 

Cape Buffalo

We only saw these guys once, in the air during our helicopter tour of the Okavango Delta in Botswana.

Okavango Delta, Botswana
That’s them on the right — sorry, that was all we got!

Rhinoceros

We saw at least a dozen rhinos in Etosha National Park.  At one point, a mama rhino crossed the road with her baby in tow.  We crept forward in our truck, but we must have gotten too close because Mama charged our truck broadside and then chased us down the road for good measure!  Rhinos may look like armored cars but, believe me, when they’re chasing your vehicle down, they are fast!

Etosha National Park, Namibia
“Oh look, a little family — let’s get closer.”
Etosha National Park, Namibia
“Holy crap! Go! Go! Go!”

Lion 

And lions – these were the one animal we really wanted to see in Africa.  I got a far-off glimpse of one at a watering hole in Etosha.  Then, on our very last game drive, we caught sight of this guy:

Etosha National Park, Namibia

Etosha National Park, Namibia

Leopard

We never saw a leopard.  But we did spy this cheetah hanging out in a copse of trees in Hwange.  I love the way they move, all slinky, lithe power.

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe - Version 2

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe - Version 3

We saw dozens of species of animals other than just the Big 5, though.  Some honorable mentions:

Hippos

These guys are scary.  Statistically, they are the most dangerous animal to humans.  When you’re in a pond, never knowing when they might surface on top of you and fling you into hippo- and croc-infested waters, they’re pretty intimidating.  Check out those teeth!  They also make this grunting noise that sounds like an asthmatic Bond villain’s laugh – “Hunh, hunh, hunh, hunh.”  Only it’s not funny when they’re right outside your tent.

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe

Zebra

We saw so many zebra in three weeks that spying new ones became, well, boring.  Zebra, a dime a dozen, who would have thought?

Etosha National Park, Namibia
Oh, you again.

Giraffes

I love these guys.  From their sweet, big eyes with Maybelline-long lashes to the way they’re so gawky when they drink water, I just adore them. I always got excited to spot giraffe, although we also saw loads of them.

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Etosha National Park, Namibia

Etosha National Park, Namibia

Wildebeest

Such an ugly animal — they look like Frankenstein’s monster, just a jumble of different animal parts.  But I still loved to watch them gallivanting across the savannah or stop to look guilelessly up at our truck.

Etosha National Park, Namibia

Hwange National Park, Zimbabwe

Warthogs

Another entry in the so-ugly-they’e-cute category.  When they run, though, they stick their tail straight up in the air and prance off in this feminine, Frasier and Niles Crane kind of way that cracks me up.

Victoria Falls - Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe

Ostrich (and other birds)

Ostriches look like some kindergartner’s drawing of a bird — big turkeys with long legs and a long neck attached, topped by an old man’s bald head.  The males have beautiful black and white plumage that brought out the Cruella de’Ville in me.  I want those feathers!

Cape Point, South Africa
At Cape Point, South Africa
Etosha National Park, Namibia
Look, it’s Zazu! (I never did learn this bird’s real name.)

Various deer-like creatures

We saw more kudu, springbok, oryx, impala, and hartebeests than you can shake a stick at.  My favorite were oryx, with their monochromatic coloring and long horns.  A nice thick oryx steak cooked medium-rare is darned tasty, too.

Etosha National Park, Namibia
Oryx
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Impala — note the decimated fence that was supposed to keep animals out of our campsite

 

Hyena

We only saw hyenas once — and unlike my idea of them from The Lion King, I think they’re actually a really beautiful and graceful animal. We spotted them on our night safari so we don’t have any photos.

 

Every game drive brought something new. We’re already trying to figure out how to get back here as soon as possible — perhaps to spot a kill or a chase and spot that elusive leopard!

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